Vending Machine

Quixotically Yours wrote:

you get a purple hippo

*inserts book*

Gives the purple hippo to great niece.

*inserts a $ 2.00 bill*

*Gets a bottle of overpriced soda*

(They're $1.50 from our vending machines, only a matter of time before they cost $2 a bottle from the machines)

*Inserts mysterious unmarked but recorded-on DVD*

your home made porn vid gets aired through national public TV

*inserts snowball*

Out comes a can of Tab.

Inserts a Kelloggs Eggo Waffle.

you get a burnt kellogs eggo waffle

*inserts 100% pure no sugar added cranberry juice*

You get a happy bladder and kidneys.

*Inserts a Tic Tac*

you get a thumb tack


*inserts Mummy*

you get a bowl of festering inerds. (inerds as in the redneck term meaning guts)

*inserts a pocket full of beer caps*

And you get a sticker that says "thanks for recycling!"

inserts a box of cracker jacks...

you get a bag of peanuts

*inserts headphones*

You get a dj...

*inserts dead fish*

you get roly poly fish heads *insers marker*

Quixotically Yours wrote:

you get roly poly fish heads

thanks for getting that song stuck in my head now

Sitalique wrote:

Quixotically Yours wrote:

you get roly poly fish heads

thanks for getting that song stuck in my head now

you get an annoying song that gets stuck in your head for hours

oh too late!

*inserts cell phone*

out comes a whopping phone bill...

*inserts asthma inhaler*

You get one zippy sleeycat!

*inserts rubber gloves*

You get to have an exam by Dr, Proctor


*inserts t-shirt*

you win first place at the wet t-shirt contest

*inserts guitar pick*

and out comes Dan Donegan from Disturbed.

*inserts a PB and J*

machine eats sandwhich and lets out a powerful burp that blasts you half-way across the room...sooo you get belched at?

*inserts 80's song*

Out comes Cindy Lauper...

*inserts bottle of ketchup*

You get a fragrance of eggs as the machine makes a meal for itself of eggs and ketchup.

Bleargh.

*Inserts this emoticon: *

you get a vampire lerched onto your neck

*inserts a buck two-fifty*

You get called a vintage comic book


*inserts dollar*