The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese in the trap.
- Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
- Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
- If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
- How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand.
- OK, so what's the speed of dark?
- When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
- Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
- Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
- Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
- A day without sunshine is like night.
- On the other hand, you have different fingers.
- 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
- 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
- Remember, half the people you know are below average.
- He who laughs last thinks slowest.
- Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
- Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
- Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
- If I promise not to kill you...can I have a hug?
- I have the heart of a child...it's in a jar on my desk
- Bother me and die...thank you
- Do not walk behind me, for I may lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
- Never test the depth of water with both feet.
- Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.