This is something that is near and dear to my heart as I have battled with it, have a spouse who I believe suffers from it, and have various family members who also have it. I wrote this back in January this year during a really bad time after breaking ties with my family and fighting with my husband.
Behind my eyes lies the torture inside
the darkness and light
the wrong and right
the loser in the fight
I keep battling the fire inside
the burning for more
when what I want is less
still I search behind every door
When will the confusion subside?
Is it all a lie?
Will it end if I die?
The madness runs rampant through my mind
and it's not fair I should have to rewind
just to remember the past forgotten
When will the confusion subside?
Is it all a lie?
Will it end if I die?
Yet I live another day to try and try and try...
Mistakes I have made
sins dearly paid
absolution obtained?
The self double is forever present
while I try to become unique
it hides underneath
lurking for the moment when the gate is open
and the guard is down
What hell will reign within a girl in a white gown?
"Turn that frown upside down"
but why should I smile?
when all that awaits me
is another long mile
in the arduous journey of my tormented soul.
copyright 2009 Kat
no one may copy this for ANY reason